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Photo: Aaron Wagner We all have them, those memories that are so vivid they blaze in our memories forever. We remember exactly where we were, what we were wearing, the time of day, and all the details — although we may not remember the specific date. One of my searing memories takes me back to one wintry Saturday in eighth grade. The phone rang about eleven in the morning. It was a boy — calling me! History was made that day. I’ll save the details for my memoir, and tell you only that it was the hottest guy in our class, asking me to meet him at the ice rink that afternoon. No! This was too good to be true. Besides, my parents wouldn’t let me date until I was sixteen. Besides, he sounded just like my best girl friend, who had a rather husky voice, and I kept trying to get “her” to admit who she was. When I called her immediately after hanging up, she assured me she hadn’t called. I believed her. The voice didn’t sound quite the same. When I got back to school on Monday, I was apparentl...

What’s better than sitting in your favorite chair rereading one of your own stories? Sitting in a reading group, reading that story to an appreciative audience! You’ve probably heard that the #1 fear of Americans is public speaking. If the option had been on the list, I have no doubt that “Reading my own work to a group” would surely be #2, and it might even be #1, because nearly everyone writes their own speech before delivering it. Toastmasters was officially founded in 1924 by Ralph Smedley to help men improve their ability to effectively speak to groups. The seeds he planted have grown like kudzu, spreading around the world. More than 4,000,000 people, both men and women, have benefited from Toastmasters training, myself included. I recommend it to any writer, even if you never speak to groups. Membership fees are affordable, and the training in organizing your thoughts will help you think and write more clearly! The key to the success of Toastmaster clubs is the use of peer evalu...

Few people think of funerals as a time for gathering family stories, but that may be one of their prime functions. Pittsburgh Post Gazette columnist Sally Kalson underscores this aspect of an otherwise grim event in today’s column , Family lore: There's no time like a funeral for remembering the good stuff as she commemorates her aunt, Paula “Paul” Ruth Mitchel, who was buried last Monday. Sally’s column is full of fun, like the story about the time Aunt Paul put a dent in her husband’s brand new car. Within the column are enough snapshot stories to fill an entire volume about Aunt Paul and her whole delightful family. Between peals of laughter as I read, several thoughts crossed my mind: It’s refreshing to read something positive and amusing on the OpEd page of the paper best known for critical, negative and generally less than uplifting content. I’m grateful to Sally for sharing the shining example of her aunt’s life. Anyone inclined to write about family history should always...

Not just everyone grew up with Uncle Remus, but he was a frequent bedtime favorite in my family. My dad was born in Oklahoma into a family that hailed from further South only a generation or two earlier, and he read Uncle Remus with gusto. But my sister got the Uncle Remus book when we were grown, and I’d quite forgotten good old Br’er Rabbit until a friend used the Tar Baby as a metaphor. Wanting to read the story again, I headed to Google, and sure enough. Uncle Remus is on the web. “The Wonderful Tar Baby Story" is found on a website sponsored by the University of Virginia. As I reread about Br’er Rabbit's encounter with the Tar Baby, I could just hear my daddy readin’ along, drawlin’ and havin’ the bess ole time. He didn’t always talk that way, but he sure could when he read Uncle Remus stories. This story reminded me that people from other countries or ethic backgrounds, or Americans who have lived or traveled abroad, often wonder how to handle dialect in their writing...

Appearance definitely matters. This is no less true for pages than people, and I include both digital and paper pages. In a single afternoon I came across four  instances where choices of font, type size, color, or formatting made reading a challenge for me. It’s never a good idea to make reading difficult. It’s way too easy for readers to set your work aside, or click away from it.  Here’s what I found: A memoir with double-spacing between paragraphs . The story seemed choppy. I finally realized that my eye was interpreting the extra vertical space as a “pause signal.” This format option is standard for business letters and web layout, where your eye needs the space as a marker to remain oriented on the page. But it is not standard on printed pages where it is typically used to indicate a break in thought or scene.  A double-spaced manuscript printed in the old standard of 12 point Courier. Although they were the standard for college research papers, I never found this form easy to re...

Flickr photo by SwimParallel Within the online writing community you’ll find an ongoing discussion of the merits of writing by hand versus keyboard. Virtually all articles and posts are anecdotal, with a conspicuous lack of research. One exception is an intriguing blog interview Joy Castro  held with author and writing teacher Heather Sellers that comes close to supportable evidence. Heather claims that she can tell with near 100% accuracy by reading a student’s work whether it was written by hand or on the computer. “The best work is always written first by hand.” As I’ve noted several times, I have become a true convert to journaling, on paper, by hand. When I recently had an idea for a focused journal on a specific topic and  wanted to share part or all of it with others, I reached for the keyboard. My attempt failed miserably. After much stumbling, fumbling, and frustration, I turned to my paper journal, and words flowed again. Eventually I realized that I was writing exclusively...

Punji Pensive, by Indi Samarajiva Jamie’s sick, so I’ll have to fix a casserole to take over. This is such a simple and typical thought — the type that generally passes unnoticed, or at least unquestioned. Lately I’ve begun to notice these thoughts and question them. Increasingly often as such thoughts begin to form, I pause and rethink the situation. Is that true? Do I have to (fix a casserole, do the laundry, write a blog post) now ? Generally, the answer is No. I don’t absolutely have to do that. But I want to. Usually I’ll simply go ahead and do whatever it is, but because I stopped to think about it, I realize I do have a choice, and I do the task with more awareness and presence. Any hint of resentment fades. My life has gradually become more peaceful, more joyful, and less stressful as a result. For that I am enormously grateful. What does this have to do with life writing? I’m convinced this powerful thought-habit sprang from journaling. This isn’t anyone’s fancy system. I’m...

Today is National Grammar Day. To celebrate, I’m sharing some amusing grammar mistakes that made it into print. “Except for a tragic accident, the 35th annual Bath Heritage Days parade went off without a hitch.” The Times Record (Bath, Maine) . A tragic accident is a minor deviation from going off without a hitch! “The Patchwork Quilt Guild met to celebrate Christmas with a gift and cookie exchange. Kay Hanley wore a necklace and she was lit up and flashing all during the meeting.”  From the Fallon (Montana) County Times. What was in the punch? “Hundreds of marijuana plants were discovered growing in a south Lakeland home Saturday. Two were arrested.” From the (Polk County, Florida) Ledger . Only two out of hundreds? “Domestic diva Martha Stewart still needs a crutch to lean on as she recovered from hip surgery during a cocktail party in the Hamptons.” From the Globe. Most of us have surgery in a hospital. “On All-Star weekend, the city gleamed with banners welcoming visitors h...